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Teh Alisun Show Halowen Special
alisun: twas teh nite before holowen nd al threw teh mist, not a creatur was stiring nut even our good lord sis sis: shut teh fak up alisun: fuck off, ugly lemme finish. fuk i lost my plaec. wotever, basecly i threw an iconic perty to relase GLAM and no1 caem. teh end. *doorbell rings* alisun: o thank teh gud lordney some1 came *loly jean stands at door with a white sheet over her head* loly: treck or treck, fuckre. lololololol *loly barges her way inside* alisun: u arent welcum here. fucking bitch cindy: hrey alisun: wtf r u suposed 2 be cindy: am a walshwolf alisun: not shaveing 4 a few days and wearing 4-leefed clovers on ur nips nd fany isnt a costume cindy: am so high *there's a loud crash and cindy and alisun go to investigate, noticing naet burst through alisun's roof, landing on her floor* naet: operation treck or tret is a go alisun: naet u ugly whore dats cumin out of ur paychek naet: i cunt be tamed alisun: cindy, wil u roll dis fatty out of my haus for me? alisun: ... alisun: cindy? *alisun turns to face cindy who is laying on the ground, asleep* alisun: bitch *loud music begins to play, trumpets and trombones filling the house* tomás: ladies. move. gentlemen. move. tomás: sum1 ring teh alarm tomás: a legend in teh haus literaly every1 else: ..... alisun: who teh fak? val aka joy: gays, gays i just saw a spooky goast sis: what teh fuk, val, you stupid whoar? deres no such ting as goasts alisun: o hrey sauce didnt se u behind all of ur chins *meanwhile* boby zac: am so lost undres: ooo i am a spooky goast boby zac: wot teh fak omg am so scare undres: u shuld steal ur mommys purse and leeve her credit card in teh forest. den kil her off and giv all teh money to undres. for no reson. boby zac: oh shit ok undres: ha ha dum cunt alux: wtf undre y u do dat undres: i need teh money. selin copies of 'rivulries' and saying dat i maed it isnt worken anymore. nd am desprit. alux: wots new undres: escose me bich? alux: i sed wots new undres: u to teh musec industry. dats y u flop. delete urself, fat. *undres flicks aluxs vagina. alux cries and pulls his phone out, loading up twattir* *alex twetting*: i jus met @undrestehcunt recently, my name is alux (@aluxbby giv me money) nd dis is my M&G storey. i met ha on octobur therty first of dis year nd it was horrendus. she was rude, nut classy and lost a long time prostitote that day. cunt beleev i ever sold my vag to that trash. yuk. i walked into teh spooky graevyard where she just told a boby to murder its parent so i decid to sey helo. she looks at me and calls me "fat" then ignores me. i thort i misherd her so i began to say moar and told her that "you saved my life" i continue "i wouldnt be alove todei if it werent 4 u" den teh bich looks me direct in teh eye and says "you'll die soon enuf, fatty." nd den whispered "obesity". i sterted craiying. i hav nevur felt pain lik dis in my life. then she began to LAUGH and sed "y r u crying? stop it, stop it now" and she flicked my vagina! some1 took my pic nd i headed out of teh graevyard nd dats when she started speakin whale. i cunt beleve dis hapened. i cryed while writing dis. undres: wtf y did u twet blatunt lies abowt me? *alux leans ovur, flicking undres in teh vag* alux: fat *he leaves the graveyerd, undres bursting into tears* *back at teh haus of alisun* sis: wow look at all dese useless, ugly coasters alisun: put my fukin cds down be4 i end u *theres a knock at the door, alisun opens to see an old hag staring back* joe sweating: hrey ali wots popin jo: hope u stoked up on herd candy cus my sugar is raw tonite *alisun looks at ha costume to see she is dressed as the iconic princess herslef - ali jean* alisun: am spechless alisun: jus alisun: gudbye *boby zac runs into the haus and up to sis* sis: o my beautiful boby am honured u came as me but dunt u thenk naet wuld be scarier naet: teh only think scarier than ur ugly boby dressed as an ugly women is ur nose. making it out of lego was inventive, tho sis: maybe i shuld take a pag out of ur book and stay youthful by inhalin smal sections of ali's youthful soul. and by book i mean spelbok u ugly troll. naet: fuk u, ugly *a small tear rolls down sis' face* sis: a momunt, if u wil *sis runs off to teh bathroom, leaving boby zac and naet together* naet: ... boby zac: ... naet: ... bob zac: did u cal me ugly u prick naet: o luk deres val val: gays teh othur ugly people wont belev me so i hav to tel u dense fuckers. i saw a ghoast. naet: val u stupid old ho deres no such theng as ghoasts doc: hrey every1 naet: i tel a lie val: ffs weres sis naet: i caled her ugly nd she pissed off in tears *sis in teh bathroom, listening to Concrete Angel and crying, val bursting inside* sis: val leve me alone val: no i cant deres a ghoast and no1 belevs me. teh only one stupid enuff to belev me is u. ur my last hope. *sis looks out the window as a ghoast wearing an irish flag floats by* sis: o ffs its just cindys career val: no its not u fuk help me find owt who it is *back in teh livin room* mayur: hrey am senden sum1 to teh shop for booze. am too young to buy it nd my mom isnt here. who wants sum? cindy: one botle of vodker pls cindy: i cant be timed zac: make dat two. sum rena cunt shaded me on twatir seying hes guna b here nd i need to smash ha wif sumfin. *3 seconds later* mayur: am back from teh store nd dey refused to serve naet. i thort we took her becuz she was teh oldest hag and had the saggiest tits naet: u wot *suddenly, the lights go out and everything is in darkness* alisun: o dats just gr8 undres: sombody gettin fired boby zac: o ur here when teh fak did u get here sis: i think my boby just stabbed me boby zac: no momther its just my luv for u sis:no am bleeding boby zac: mom shut teh fuk up ur fine undres: hi val: has aney1 got a mach, we can light renas breathe rena: stop tryin 2 be sassy alisun: didnt notice u were here rena rena: helo val: has any1 sen teh ghoast of cindys career othur dan me and sis every1: ... val: o dats fukin dandy. wel fuk dis. am owt. *val walks into wall* val: weres teh fuken door mayur: if u wena find teh ghoast, sum1 has to go turn teh powur bak on cindy: its in teh big fat basement alisun: y do u no that. uv nevor been 2 my haus before cindy: am so high tomás: wel we hav 2 send sum1 down to teh basement nd ur haus ali so... alisun: only if sum1 goes wif me val: r they likely to die alisun: probably every1: naet *naet and ali go to teh basement to see Andy trying to ressurect his argument with joe. his scientists ana and becca stand near by* andy: ok teh machine is up nd redy 3 go naet: dr jenner wot in teh naem of czech republic r u doing andy: am resurectin mah fite wif jo so i can finally get sum relevance lol naet: and why teh fak r they here alisun: fuk dat i thort u were ghoasts. hu gives a shit abut ur fite. beca: a ghoast? ana: u must hav just seen me in my v fashenable croatian clothes andy: stfu and behold the power of my machine *the machine fires up as jo and val fall through the floor, landing on the machine and breaking it* jo: dat was aculy not me andy: omg i hav bin werking on dis victim plan for like 5 minutes dis is teh most embarasing thing ever andy: .... jo, val, naet, alisun, ana nd beca: ... andy: am guna go hoam nd embaras myslef further on ask.fum andy: bye *andy scampers off* val: we got teh ghoast val: yas naet: im thrillered 4 u, ugly jo: where teh fak is my drank *blak widow - alisun jeen plays as teh epidose end* alisun: wot a spooky epidose i thenk u agrey cindy: wach out 3 my new musec video for my latest singel out soon loly: as wel as sum other speshul shit sis: hu teh fuk let her do teh outro loly: eat my pusy, ugly val: wil some1 just end teh epidose tomás: dey talk way 2 much it'll never end lyk dis alux: says u cunt, hu evn r u rena: idk any of u lol undres: *flicks renas vag* fat boby zac: wtf momther y arent u ded undres: u dumb cunt u aculy stabed her? am nut a ghoast boby zac: lol yolo no regrets am a 12 yeer old mayur: am elevn sis: mayur u r nineten mayur: no am stil a boby ok alisun: wil you al stfu and buy 'GLAM'? ana: is et avelable in croatia? alisun: not for u, bich beca: fuk dis. ur all pricks. am leavin. andy: has my career been revived yet? every1: ... *everyone leaves, leaving andy alone* andy: helo? i want to be relevant again? pls? naet: c u later my nateonsters, remembur to buy teh powur of same sex lu-- *nathan is cut off, the episode ending* have a spooky halowenmas ladies nd gays x